I’m in the midst of some social media navel-gazing. (What’s new, right?) Nothing revolutionary at all, just a dose of malformed rumination on the effects of social technology on behavior, with a side dish of cranky “you kids stay offa my lawn” thrown in for good measure.
Previously, I’d written that “Text messaging is a way for unaccompanied non-smokers to look busy in bars,” but we’ve clearly taken it to the next level. I’ve been disturbed to note the now-many times I’ve been hanging out with folks, and finding we’re all sitting together, but head-down and screen-lit, texting, browsing, or otherwise fiddling with our mobiles.
Presence vs. Attention
There was a Washington Post article on texting that trod similar territory earlier this month, “Text Is Cheap,” on how we let texting interrupt our real-world attention and conversation. You’d think that being with the person you’re, you know, with, should take priority over remote people, but it’s kind of like when you’re standing at a sales counter and the clerk is taking a call — because you’re a presence right there, the clerk doesn’t have to do as much to keep you there, whereas the other person is just a disembodied voice on the phone and can hang up at any time. So the clerk has to put more effort into keeping the remote person on the line, and can buy some time using nonverbal gestures to mollify you (especially since many folks don’t want to be “rude,” even if they’re being rude to.)
It makes a perverse kind of sense.
A related phenomena is the competition for attention — Salon has a book review of Rapt, by Winifred Gallagher. (Which I haven’t read. The book, I mean — I skimmed the review.) Again, not really new stuff — we know all about switching costs, multitasking, shiny things, distractions, and sensory overload. For an additional buzzword, there’s always continuous partial attention.
Friend-Surfing
Another challenge when you’re interacting with someone is the insidious desire to see what else is going on, and even the temptation to trade up. It’s like being at a networking event, cocktail party, or meat market where you’re always looking for someone better to talk to. Having mobile social media can mean that you’re always shopping for a more interesting conversation from someone online, which means that you’re not invested in your current conversation — it’s kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Unquestionably, mobile social media can take you out of the moment, so the question is, is the remote connection you’ve established as meaningful as the one you’ve sacrificed? Given that in-person connections are so packed with information and nuance (through both verbal and non-verbal means), I’d have to say generally, no. Unless you’re not getting anything out of it and looking for a distraction, anyway.
Anyway, there’s a book called Be Here Now by guru Ram Dass. I’ve never read it (and in fact, have no clue as to what it’s about, but I always liked the title. To me, it suggests that you should stay in the moment and the presence you’re currently inhabiting. One of the things about social media and mobile media tools is that it helps you connect with people who are remote from you, at some expense of disconnecting you from people close to you.
I realize there’s not a whole lot of concreteness in this entry, so I’d be interested in hearing your comments and anecdotes — do you think you have a grip on balancing your mobile social communications when you’re out and about?
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